Actually, "think" might be a stretch. I feel about this. Yeah. That's it. And it's probably definitely disco. I'm not an ironic 'blipster', or an apathetic psuedo-nostaligic doodootank, or even a pathetic nostalgic doodoonut. There's no intentional "webslinging" def. 1, but these song/videos make me think my dick's wet/whet my dick.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
i don't write about my dreams. i can't remember them. i can remember things that i think about right as i wake up but that's more like a to-do list than a dream per se. that said, i bet if i could remember my dreams, many of them would like the youtube below.
ganked from brown blog http://www.ultrabrown.com/ the following is "one of those rare duets between Lata Mangeshkar & Asha Bhonsle." From the 1973 film Jalte Badan:
There's hella weed and babes in this (by the way).
I spent a lot of time in college thinking about hippies and hinduism. spiritual tourism. george harrison and sitars. hindu iconic imagery. gurus. I think it was easier to appropriate indian and indigenous "american" culture because, for one, there was a lack of proximity. those dudes wouldn't see me rocking a kurta playing the sitar, they're all the way in india. it wasnt until 1965 that immigration allowed for indians to come here en masse. the first 10 years after 1965 about 90% of south asians coming here had phd's and masters degrees anyway. those dudes were dealing with beakers and algorithms, they wouldnt have given a shit if they saw a white dude with a tikka on his forehead. as for indigenous peoples, that whole genocide thing took care of them. at the same time you had panthers using violence to fight for equal rights and that's a clear no-go for hippies. so there was a clear influx of aspects of indian culture to america in the 1960s.
i never thought about, perhaps because it's not as widespread, aspects of american culture reaching india. specifically, i never thought about aspects of american hippie culture reaching india. the indian economy wasn't liberalized until 1991 so it was difficult for some of the more penetrable corporate, capitalist, guap-based thingz to get over there but music, film - cultural capital - moved in different ways. thus you have bands like savage encounter, from my previous post, being influenced more so by american garage bands than the british garage bands closer to home and already with a long history of influence in india. "influence" - that's it, nothing else. you also have visual aethetic influences like in the flier above that looks a little "psychedelic" to me. though sex and free love, women dressing provocatively, etc., have always been a part of hinduism they became more frowned upon as time went on and various conquerors came through india. perhaps on some protect-your-women shit. so in this instant, the way dude in the youtube up there takes shorty's shirt off isn't entirely some kind of western thing, but for the early 1970s its pretty bold.
Here's another example of HIPPIE culture pervading India in the 70s - Dum Maro Dum. Method Man sampled the guitar line of this song a couple of years back and a young Himanshu was like, wait, what the fuck? This is one of the prized jewels of our filmi song world and theres also hella weed and babes:
while im not forgiving hippies (including you, baba ram das racist - even if you did get a degree from wesleyan), i guess i'm glad shit was RELATIVELY a 2 way street cuz it made dum maro dum and joints like it possible.
also i wrote a 10 page paper on hippies and hinduism in college and the white teacher of the hindu course gave me a b- because i didnt talk enough about what the beatles and other appropriators had to say about their appropriation. are you serious? fuck that.
I had a dream that I was walking around in some beautiful natural setting and then all of a sudden I was Spiderman and I was web-slinging (the second Urban Dictionary defiition, not the first) all over the place on like trees and rocks and then I got to a big parking lot by the ocean and ran into famed AZN actor John Cho who asked if he could "catch a ride" to McDonald's and at first I was thinking it would be a pain in the ass but then I was like, "Wait, I'm Spiderman, I can do this." And I picked him up and started webslinging (again, second Urban Dictionary definition, not first) on the streetlamps in the parking lot but then I end up sort of flying over the ocean and I make a kind of paraglider out of Spiderman webs and float into a McDonald's through what is apparently an open sun roof and inside is political documentarian Eugene Jarecki getting interviewed by some college girl.
Monday, June 29, 2009
Whilst plundering yotub for amazing Howard Huntsberry tracks other than his version of Higher&Higher from Ghostbusters 2, I happened across what I'd thought was just some fantasy fact from childhood. I mean, I thought that this shit wasn't a good enough idea to have been real. Truth is stranger/better than fiction? Not so sure? I kinda like the first track and will definitely subject a party to it:
"This is about as obscure as garage gets. For two years, 1970 and 1971, a cigarette company in India sponsored some kind of battle-of-the-bands competition, with the winners going to Calcutta to record for compilations called Simla Beat. Each year an lp was released with no info about the bands other than their hometown. Also issued was this 45 released with two of the better tracks and some silly liner notes on the back of the sleeve (detail here).
Some people think this is a hoax, or that the recordings came from somewhere other than India. It's true that some bands have a similar sound, though this could be from sharing a studio and perhaps instruments as well. Also, the bands lean heavily on American rock of the time and show very little British influence. " - http://www.garagehangover.com/?q=node/86
Came across these photos of some of the bands included on that simla beat competition. trying to track down the vinyl, along with the savages vinyl which may have came out in the 60s making it the first indian rock album to come out on vinyl. whoa.
unidentified band at simla beat competition, 71/72
savage encounter, lead singer/drummer bashir sheikh went on to be a serious a&r type dude. savage encounter was a band formed with nandu bhende's brief encounter and bashir sheikh's the savages.
savage encountersavage encounter
Friday, June 26, 2009
JA is cool. for those of you that don't know, he is one of NYC's most notorious graffiti rap tagging bombers ever. For those of you who don't know part two, his father directed Rocky, Rocky 5, Karate Kid 1 2 and 3, and Lean On Me among others. For those of you that don't not know for REAL, he also made this public access show called brushstrokes that's very funny. He would be Shams De Baron the rap dude, or Norman Vename the gay art critic. He interviews people at dumb LA openings and makes them look dumb while he is being funny. Also buss this kid 3 screen test that makes you wish he was in the movie.
So, I've been both busy and relatively
I had a dream that me and a person who doesn't exist but was my best friend in the dream were strapped into these special gigantic seats and playing some ridiculous, hyper-realistic version of the game Doom. Instead of aliens or monsters though, we mostly were shooting regular people walking down the street, trying to find a man named Lombardo. Shortly afterward, I was in my friend Benn Goldschein's apartment in Bushwick drinking Peach Georgi (does this exist?) and thinking about going to the park, where we were instantly teleported to. There were holes in the sand of the park and we had these huge cans of 'mice spray' that we started spraying at the entrances of all these little holes. The spray was incredibly noxious and we kept tossing the cans to the floor after a spray but eventually I saw a dead mouse at the entrance of one of the holes and I plucked it out with my fingers and tossed it at a kid who was sitting nearby. Benn told the kid to 'look at the rainbow' and there was a plastic rainbow attached to a lightpole. I was wearing dark yellow wristbands.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
So some geniuses over in Scotland have finally figured out what the internet is good for, besides these three things. On their website, you upload a picture of yourself and tell them your gender, age, and ethnicity, then some weird gaelic cyber genie figures out what you would look like if you were a different age, gender, or ethnicity.
YES THAT'S RIGHT. ETHNICITY. I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO SHOW YOU WHAT AGE AND GENDER DO CAUSE THAT SHIT IS BONER. ALL YOU NEED TO SEE IS:
So now that I'm black, I thought, "Why can't I be blacker?" So I fed Black Me through the Racist-o-Matic 9000, over and over again, until I was black times infinity plus one:
But I thought this was a little racist, and so I decided to give some other ethnicities a chance, like, Asian!
But again, that's still pretty one-sided, and so, in the end, I decided to be equal parts black, equal parts asian, like my hero, Fred Astaire:
So now I'm Blasian Bob. In honor of my new self-imposed, hyperbolic ethnicity, I have stripped a couple 'friends of color' of mine of their respective ethnicities:
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
HOW DOES THIS ONLY HAVE 1600 VIEWS??
CAN WE GET AN INTERVIEW WITH THIS GUY? I BET HE'LL TAKE HIS SHIRT OFF TOO
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
GOODIE MOB, FAT JOE, COMMON, MACK10, AND AFRIKA BAMBAATAA COMBINE FORCES UNDER A WU-ESQUE SPRITE LOGO TO BEAT UP SOME ANIME BULLSHIT!! WIKIPEDIA WIKINFORMS ME THAT THE ARTISTS REPRAZENT SOUTHERN, EAST COAST, MIDWEST, AND WEST COAST HIP-HOP, RESPEKIVELY. OF COURSE AFRIKA IS THE UNITIVE GRANDPA OF HIP HOP, AND THUS HIS SPINNING BASS THRONE SITS IN VOLTRON'S HEAD.
Really? You're not gonna play a video where like a dozen cats get zooted on catnip?
thehype10 (8 minutes ago)
That drooling cat is doped out of his brains! Haha!
This dude talks about Arizona Iced Tea in this way: 'If she too good for the Cherry Coke, hit her with the Arizona" This dude is kind of a clown, so thank god he keeps all this shit in his house so people can come over booted and take advantage of him. This is the type of shit that makes me hate the modern world, but also, love it.
Monday, June 22, 2009
Saturday, June 20, 2009
I had a dream I found a Snickers bar on the ground but it had a little tear in the wrapper so I was going to go to a corner store to see if I could be like "Hey, this Snickers bar has a tear in the wrapper, could I get a new one?" (I realize I tend to never have money in any of my dreams.) But before I find a corner store, I run into fellow Gordon Gartrelle blogger Kate Bryant, who tells me that some (fictional) band called 27 Cigarettes had just hijacked a plane.
The dream then cut to a music video of theirs that was basically the Blind Melon video for No Rain plus the Soul Asylum video for Run Away Train, which got taken off of Youtube but as I remember it has a lot of pictures of lost children in it. I forget the name of the 27 Cigarettes song but the album was called Light Up. I was like, "This band is wack."
Friday, June 19, 2009
Here's our interview with Will They Grow?'s Martina. I think we covered a wide range of topics with these five questions. Enough to give ya'll a better of idea of whose behind the nipples.
Are you familiar with the Honeymooners? Do you think that show's funny at all? Sometimes, late at night, I get a very nostalgic feeling for a past that's not mine, and enjoy the show. Other times I get angry at Alice for being a "sassy" woman whose basically just a compliant housewife. Am I off-base?
I know exactly what you mean, because this is how I feel about the show Friends. It's really not a good show at all, but when it comes on in reruns in the middle of the night, I feel a longing for it to be my personal history. I always think, "Why don't I have a large close group of friends like this, who always say witty things and have serious hair cuts?" But then sometimes, I'm like "Are you really that stupid? Do any of you even have jobs??" Plus, I can never figure out how old they're supposed to be. They act like they're 25, but they are somehow able to afford that giant apartment overlooking Central Park.
When a girl walks by on say, a Saturday night, and I jokingly say something like 'What's really hood?' under my breath but loud enough for the girl to hear, is this inappropriate? It's not quite cat-calling but it might still be construed as a violation of somebody's 'personal space'. Should I stop doing this? (ADDITIONAL INFO: I normally have a very non-threatening demeanor and physical appearance)
Aliens have landed on earth, they are exactly like human beings in every single way except for their skin color. It's a color we've never seen human beings be before. What color would you want it to be? Basically I'm asking you what your favorite color is, with limited options.
I'd like to see the aliens have deep yellow skin, like on The Simpsons. If Carrot Top had yellow skin, he'd look like Sideshow Bob. If Bob Barker had yellow skin, he'd look like Mr. Burns. I like to think that my yellow skin counterpart would be that cool babysitter that Bart had a crush on. She was rad.
What cell phone service do you use? Are you satisfied?
Do you think all the access that children these days have to technology/social networks will lead to them being awkward in "real-life" situations and ultimately lead to them having less sex? What do you think of 'kids today'? (KIDS: 10-18 years old)
In-depth Interview with Martina:
Previous GG Post:
Just woke up on the floor, face down, completely sober. While lying there I had a dream that me and two close friends were taking a train on Mars. At one point I looked out the window and could only see vast expanses of ice and was terrified that a man next to me told me if the train got into a crash we'd all be killed because it was so cold. The train required a lot of switching at stations, and it was very difficult and important to get onto your next train (back to Earth) or you'd have to wait for several days for the next one. The trains looked more or less exactly like Amtrak trains but they were on Mars. Almost all of the people taking the train were Japanese tourists or poor and transient minorities. At one of the switching stations I befriended a dreadlocked Japanese man and his wife (who strongly resembled The Boredoms, who I was looking at pictures of two days ago). They helped me find a newspaper, which I kept asking for, and helped us find the next switching station which resembled soccer park style bleachers. As we sat there, a couple below and a solitary young man (who physically resembled an old friend from junior high school whom I haven't spoken with in a decade) talked about cars and how they have become impractical to use on Earth. I repeatedly tried to interject so I could talk about 'debt' and the look-alike solitary man kept interrupting me. Finally I stood up and screamed 'WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? THE KING OF TALKING?' and then woke up.
So I've been neglecting my blogging duties as of late. My bust. It's not y'all, its me. I also blame Twitter and the phenomena of micro-blogging. Lucky for y'all, Dap, Kate and the others at GG have really been holding shit down. That said, I ordered a computer in the mail so I can surf the web at home after work and should be back up on this bitch shortly.
Speaking of computers, last night I went to see Gordon Voidwell and eventually The Pains of Being Pure at Heart play live music shows. Though the computer part isn't just yet, I did know about these shows because of the internet and internet friendship which would be difficult without a computer. Eventually I found myself with the homie Quinn and FAMED RAPPER AND GORDON GARTRELLE CONTRIBUTOR Despot at 4 am on the street corner in front of Enid's. Across the street, shining under a streetlight, was a dude sitting down, back against the wall, feet stretched out, on his laptop - just sitting there. What was he doing? Alec wanted to rob him, but I wanted to help him out and point him in the right direction - maybe because he had some kind of South Asian or Middle Eastern looking thing going on. (This means he may have been South Asian or Middle Eastern). We decided we had to do something. At that point it wasn't clear whether we were going to rob him or advise him to leave, but we knew we had to do something. The confusion was intoxicating. Wait, no, not the confusion. The alcohol I had been consuming the entire evening was intoxicating. We had so many questions: Did this dude get up out of bed at 4 am to hit up the corner and use his laptop? What was he doing on there, online shopping? We had 2 questions. We crossed the street and approached dude: "What are you doing, man?" I don't really remember anything he said which I now realize makes this story pretty useless but I remember telling him it "wasn't a good look" to be on "the block" like that and he didn't seem phased. That said, ten minutes later I do remember looking across the street and seeing that he had taken our advice and left.
That story was mediocre and I feel strange about writing it and asking that you read it.
Which leads me to why I'm posting today, Hans Beck. Hans Beck is the collaborative effort of Sam Han and Chip Beck. In college, Sam Han produced a song that my friend Jeffrey Haynes and I rapped on. It was called "YOU MIGHT GET MURKED" and went over the variety of ways we may or may not be interested in killing you and reasons why we'd be open to such (i.e. Someone touching my cooler ranch doritos, because I've been in this foodrap game since I been rapping.) Chip Beck, you may recall, made a sweet remix of the Pizza song we did and also produced the beat for Fake Patois. Together they are HANS BECK, who sounds like its ONE DUDE but really its 2 DUDES one of whom looks nothing like a dude who would be named HANS. Peep this, inspired by the Canucks logo:
Wale is a rapper from Washington, DC who I enjoy. Daniel Merriweather is a popular R&B singer/songwriter associated with Mark Ronson. Why am I talking about all of this? Because those dudes remixed those dudes and Mark Ronson and Daniel Merriweather will personally choose the winner from the Top Five downloaded versions. The winner will be on RCRDLBL for a week. Don't be an asshole, go download it. The embed won't work so just
Download here: http://rcrdlbl.com/artists/Daniel_Merriweather_Contest/track/Change_Feat_Wale_Hans_Beck_Remix
Then delete the file or use a different computer and download again at the same place:
Then delete the file or use a different computer and download again at the same place:
Then delete the file or use a different computer and download again at the same place:
That's what I did.
See Hans Beck and myself, DJ MAGGIE LAUTEN, play music for you on a stage that will be graced by Gordon Voidwell, Claire Hux, and LEIF.
That's: http://www.myspace.com/gordonvoidwell +
Leif is always a blast to peep, Gordon Voidwell gets more and more enjoyable every time I see dude and he's something like a charming man, no homo - can i no homo that?, and I'm psyched to see Claire Hux. Why am I psyched to see Claire Hux? Allow me to keep it 100 with you for a second... More so than any musical merit they have, which they do, it's almost 100% due to my appreciation for all things cosby (see: the name of this blog). I was sold before I heard anything.
I put up a bunch of youtubes but my computer froze and now I really want to get out of the office because it's 5:39 PM on Friday. Wooo. As of late I feel like every day has been Friday, and that's no good because Friday's have lost their significance. I gotta think about that. In the mean time enjoy this video of Peter Schilling and band performing Major Tom in the early 80s on some German tv station.
Also, Morgan Freeman is divorcing his wife because of the relationship he has with his step-granddaughter he's been smashing since she was 17. This also caused a rift in his relationship with his long-time mistress.
Greedhead of the Week: Morgan Freeman.
Thursday, June 18, 2009
UPDATE: 2:53 P.M. Martina from 'Will They Grow?' has agreed to answer a few questions for GG, the interview will be posted shortly. In the meantime, check out this ad for Nationwide Insurance I just found while checking the weather. What a weird, helpful looking lady! Regardless, stop trying to sell me shit internet!
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Common characteristics include drinking the cheap soft drink Faygo and wearing face paint.
CAVE IN ROCK IS THE NAME OF A PLACE? I don't remember how I found out about this, but now I feel bad I didn't know about it earlier in my life. I could have gone to ALL 9 GATHERING OF THE JUGGALOS. I could have been going since my freshman year of high school! The line-up this year includes Ice Cube and Coolio.
Here are two super quick facts about Coolio from Wikipedia:
- Coolio and jazz saxophonist Jarez were enlisted in July 2008 as spokespersons by the group Environmental Justice and Climate Change to educate students at historically black colleges and universities about global warming.
- On February 25 2009, Coolio performed at Staffordshire University in Stoke-on-Trent, England. When he attempted a stage dive during a performance, the crowd parted and let him crash to the floor. As he lay there in obvious pain, the crowd mugged him, stealing his watch, gold chain, sunglasses and one shoe. A bartender who witnessed the incident said Coolio was finally rescued by security who managed to push him back up on stage.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
I stumbled upon a picture of Rosalynn Carter, looking old and sorta decrepit but I knew something was, or had been, "going on" with that woman at some point in her life. So I GIS (Google Image Search(ed), duh) her and found a few pictures of her looking pretty dime I thought I'd share with ya'll. Then I blingee'd her for good measure. LATER YA'LL!
From The Daily Mail:
A teenage girl is suing a tattoo artist for £10,000 after she allegedly asked him for three stars on her face - but ended up with 56. Eighteen-year-old Kimberley Vlaminck paid £55 for 'the graffiti that has ruined my life' in her Belgian home town of Courtrai.
Rouslan Toumaniantz, who runs the tattoo parlour called The Tattoo Box in Courtrai, denies her claim. He said she knew 'exactly what she wanted'. He added: 'She was awake and looked into the mirror several times as the procedure was taking place.
What a fucking loser, she deserves it for wanting that '3 star' tattoo anyway. This lady scumbag probably got drunk, asked for the tattoo, got it and then sobered up and realized she potentially ruined her life. So she made up the story blaming the Romanian dude. I think everyone involved with this story is a bag of dirt and I hope they all die in the revolution.
AMERICA! Where we get tattoos of normal things like old airplanes, smoking egg-men, bicycles and this:
Monday, June 15, 2009
I think this has to do with the internet being good. One picture of a cat with a badly spelled caption might be kindof funny, but infinite pages of these pictures= funnier. I find this video bizarrely captivating.