Friday, October 31, 2008

Fashion, Kind of: Wolf Shirt

This might look like a normal shirt but it has magic powers. Don't even think about buying it if you live in New York, my order's in. Read what others had to say:

Ol Tripod says... This shirt is excellent for pulling in husky Native American bitches with diabetes.

WOLFMAN!!! says... Thanks to your shirt, I now have 97, count em, 97 venereal diseases from every twat i've tapped since I bought your shirt. Even though I'm in a wheelchair and dripping with VD's, losing all my hair and my penis looks like something out of a sci-fi horror flick, my cum-stained wolf shirt still brings in the pussy.

Lil' Conner says... If only I had worn this shirt when my dad took us fishing, maybe mom and I would have made it to shore.

Picasso says... Some people may have you think I painted portraits of various things. My efforts were 100% devoted to painting wolf shirts and various legendary people wearing wolf shirts. I, myself owned several wolf shirts. I cut off my ear because all of my wolf shirts were in the wash and I was beyond frustrated.

Bill Brasky says... I bought this shirt based off of the reviews, and I must say, it is highly over-rated. Since owning this shirt I have had no dates. I've lost my job. My car has been repossessed, and my landlord is kicking me out unless I stop wearing wolf shirts. On the other hand, the stitching is nice, and it doesn't shrink in the wash. I give it two stars.

Read all of them here:

Also, big up Mags for this image via


Thursday, October 30, 2008

Shocking News: Racism's Still Alive, They Just Be Concealing It

This just in: Republicans might be racist. So, Ashwin Madia is a sharp young Indian-American lawyer and Iraq veteran from Minnesota who is running for a seat in Congress. I had the chance to meet Ashwin at a benefit held to raise money for him at the AICON gallery, and he seems like a great guy. While he was once a Republican, he's thankfully found his way out of the dark side. Kind of. At least three photos of Ashwin in Republican attack ads have been edited to make Ashwin appear darker. Seriously guys?


Wednesday, October 29, 2008

YouTube: Foucault & Chomsky, Zizek

Most of you won't understand this stuff. It's probably over your head. I get it though. I took a Sociology 101 class at Bard so this is nothing to me:

The same goes for this. You guys will probably be like, Huh? How is the Sound of Music racist? I loved that movie, and I'm not racist. For Christ's sake, I went to Oberlin and lived in a multi-culti dorm!! Well, when I was abroad I took a cool little class called "Philosophy 101", in Paris. So I'm covered. Let's see if you are:


Music: New Teen Force + T.I.

"Party at Fountain" Swate:

UPDATE: The T.I. video was apparently wrong. That said, I still dig that Live Your Life joint thoroughly. I might even like that Whatever You Want song more.


Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Music: Armand Van Helden + Team Facelift

Had to steal this from my friends at

To all my homegirls that might hate on me for this. I know I should feel bad about liking this so much, something about demeaning, but nothing this good could ever make me feel bad. Ever.


Monday, October 27, 2008

News: Iranian Women's Police Academy

New photos from the Paris Review:


Herbs: Asher Roth (Continued)

So I previously posted on Asher Roth in a section I called Herbs. I mentioned a possible diss track, and this weekend tossed in a "Asher Roth, What a Clown" in one of Das Racist's new songs. I've had to defend that one to a friend or two. Since graduating from college my head's been too bombarded with generally useless business stuff to articulate why I feel certain ways. Thankfully, Brandon Soderberg sheds some better light on why Asher Roth is a herb. From "Asher Roth is a Problem" ( :

"Every rhyme reminds listeners of his suburban roots, his whiteness, and the gross materialism of most hip-hoppers, as if any of these ideas—that most rappers like money or that a white kid can rap—are a surprise in 2008. It’s as deep as aged dumbasses who joke about how the world’s changed because 'the best golfer’s black and the best rapper’s white.'"

"As the quote from XXL would suggest, Roth either believes or feels okay exploiting the myth that white kids are buying all the hip-hop CDs, pushing it so far as to suggest that the rap he and his fellow whiteboys buy is something they can’t "relate" to or understand, as if understanding is that superficial."

And most poignant:

"His version of "A Milli" contains ‘Intro to Peace Studies’ aphorisms like "self-centered humans are the root of all evil" and a constant reminder that the money made should go to "charity" and not to gold because "sick kids need it more than I need a necklace". It’s a contempt that occasionally stumbles into the geopolitical landscape when he invokes gas prices or something, but it’s always superficial and nowhere near as pointed as his comments to necklace-buying hip-hoppers. It’s easy for a kid from "the ‘burbs" to have such an altruistic and ideal view of how to distribute wealth, but it conveys a fundamental misunderstanding of how and why people conspicuously consume. If Roth’s comments were more intelligent and not you know, aimed only at black rappers, he’d be some kind of no-nonsense, un-PC political rapper but their muddled nature and again, how much his own whiteness pervades his raps, makes his "A Milli" sound more like the rants of an aging Dixiecrat or something."


Music: Boy Crisis

GordonGartrelle friends Boy Crisis now have their dope, debut 7" single "L'Homme" available for purchase on Rough Trade. Pitchfork's Hater No. 1, Amy Phillips, recently called the boys "the absolute worst band in the world right now" so you know this is hot:

The single's released on Chess Club. Support the art, kids.


Art: Siona Benjamin

Siona Benjamin, probably my favorite contemporary Indian artist, is currently showing an exhibit entitled "Lilith in the New World" at the Flomenhaft Gallery on 27th street. "Based on Jewish Midrashic literature, the character, Lilith, is identified as the first Eve, created from the earth at the same time as Adam. According to lore, she was unwilling to forego her equality with Adam and demanded sexual equality. Rebuffed by Adam, she took her case to God, who responded to her seductive powers by revealing His divine name. Speaking His name out loud earned her the ticket out of Pardes or Paradise and into eternal exile. Since then, Lilith has represented the mother of demons, of corruption, of indulgence, slayer of newborns, the serpent in the Garden of Eden and the seductress of men."

As I've mentioned before, Siona was brought up Jewish in a predominately Hindu and Muslim India. This is presented heavily in her work. Her style of combining direct inspiration from Mughals with her own identity and more modern influences is one I've been trying to incorporate into my own (imaginary) art. When I was most recently in India, back in 2006, I brought back 6 Amar Chitra Katha comic books to incorporate into the (imaginary) work I began in my head 4 years ago. These comic books, along with the work of Roy Lichtenstein, serve as an influence for this new series. I also started a series of drawings of Indian gods saying things like FRESH and DOPE two years ago. It's kind of dope to see Siona doing (real) work similar to my (imaginary) own.

This is like that time MIA came out and I was like, FUCK! (I'm still going to cut out the comic book images to paste onto NYC postcards.)

In other news:
1) I got this e-mail from a friend we'll let remain anonymous early this morning. "Yo that Kanye joint Robocop is dead on like Boat Trip. You need to call him out on your blog. I'm hella high off that weed dog." Boat Trip refers to the now summer-classic tune I penned back in 2007 with J-La on production. I can't listen to this song at work but in the mean time you can be the judge of that. Here's the Kanye, peep it before they take it down:
And you can hear Boat Trip at my myspace:
2) I got on the list for tomorrow's Animal Collective Merriweather listening party. I've mentioned my re-found appreciation for all things Animal Collective on this blog for some time now so, needless to say I was super psyched. Unfortunately, the party falls on the same day as Diwali, the main popoff Hindu holiday. I can't sleep on that - I'm trying to collect that Diwali guap. This is very unfortunate.
3) Finally, Das Racist hit the studio this past weekend to record two new songs. You can peep them here: I also started messing around, dropping verses on my boy Lynas' beats with my dude LEX. Dap got on a song we did too - a reggae love song called "In the Night". I don't know where this will go but I'm kind of hyped off of them. We're tentatively called Africa Space Station.


Thursday, October 23, 2008

Girls I Want My Parents To Arrange My Marriage With: Nadine Velazquez

Another segment of Girls I Want My Parents To Arrange My Marriage With for you. Nadine Velazquz is an American of Puerto Rican descent. My parents are cool with me marrying a non-Indian so it should be okay.


News: Boner for Bard

Nah, just playing. I'm finna talk about Wesleyan. I got a boner for Wesleyan. Ever heard of it? Yeah I went there. No big deal. It was just a good time, I mean, we were just hanging out. We didn't know we were gonna change the world. Me? I didn't know I was going to be the best financial services headhunter there ever is. It just kind of happened.

"Wesleyan University in Connecticut has spawned artists such as MGMT, Amazing Baby and Santogold - and there's more to follow. We investigate this nest of noise...". NME Magazine, basically UK's Rolling Stone, included this in their latest issue:
And from last time, Vanity Fair's take on Wesleyan in Hollywood.
"This tiny Connecticut university, with a total enrollment of 2,700, has turned out a shockingly disproportionate number of Hollywood movers and shakers. Herewith, some of the most likely to succeed..."
Here's an old video of Kids from when I was a freshman or maybe even a senior in high school:

MGMT is featured on the cover of Spin magazine this month:

Read here if you want:
Also, remember this anyone? This was also totally not a big deal.


Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Poetry: Upsize Your Manhood

So you all know I'm a poet. Basically I'm probably the best poet I know. And I know lots of poets because my circle is full of very talented people. When I had to pick my 5 for T-Mobile it was like Poet, Poet, Poet, Poet, Poet. I wrote a new poem. I'm a little rusty since I wrote "You Can Have Satyajit Ray", a poem my boy Amiri Baraka was digging when he heard it (no joke). But I'm proud of my most recent work. It's a piece inspired by internet spam, which we all know is such a pesky little devil. Am I right? Without further adue:

Upsize Your Manhood

Upsize your manhood
Make yourself perfect
Explode her mind with pleasure
Enjoy uninterrupted love
See options you can get
Power up your package
Grow thicker, harder and longer
The secret to making her come
Grow your pole by 2 inches today
Sharon loved the results I got from this
Sam's new size made me jealous
Increase your load
Always be ready for bedroom action
Show her your huge size
She loves you huge
Forget about failures in the bedroom for 3 months
Make her desire you
Turn your tool into rock hard steel
So big that she will be scared
The revolution has arrived
Don't settle for less than 9 inches
You is measured by the size of your love tool
Casanova style of life
Be confident that you will have a larger head soon
What every woman wants from their man
Become full and firm
Get better confidence for better sex
Increase in size and boost in intimate performance
Watch her come over and over again
Get size and girth here
Be a stud in bed


Music: Heart "Magic Man"

Found this video of Heart performing "Magic Man" on the KWSU program "Second Ending" in 1976. Heart fucking rules. I think Fat Joe sampled them once.


Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Music: Gang Gang Dance

GordonGartrelle super-favorites Gang Gang Dance were featured in the New York Times yesterday. Lizzi Bougatsos drops some knowledge about being in New York in the early 2000's and not feeling dudes on Ludlow in leather jackets letting the Strokes be the official New York reppers.

Like Yeasayer's music with their brown guitar dude Anand Wilder (which is really his government, holy shit), Lizzi's vocals have always reminded me of Bollywood music. I wasn't sure if I was going crazy or if the melodies seem inherently Bollywood to me. I thought maybe I was being a "race dude" who wanted to take Indian credit for something that may have not been Brown at all. Thankfully I'm not insane as the article sheds light on Lizzi's appreciation of "pygmy, Ethiopian and Bollywood music." Also, it points out that this ain't no Brooklyn band, they rep Manhattan.

Upon further digging I found an article in from Drowned in Sound that sheds more light on their taste for BrOWnSOundZ, as I call it. "When asked which musicians influence their current sound both DeWitt and Bougatsos strike in agreement over Indian composer AR Rahman. Rawwar unashamedly documents their applying a particular focus on a newfound pop sensibility, with Rahman amongst many other Bollywood influences applied, acting as a signal of intent but with each element of the quartet suitably splintering violently against one another. "Sonically, the sounds are all over the place. There is a lot in there that inspires as a producer and relates to what we do." Bougatsos snaps her head with agreement: "There is common cinematic quality between our sound."

Hell yeah. Please cop Saint Dymphna as it's probably the most accessible their music has been and I dig it for that. Probably top 5 on my year.

Drowned in Sound:

Kind of related, I've been thinking about music a lot lately and more specifically my own music. I want to start working on a new project thats spaced out as shit, involves sampling Bollywood tunes to the point where it's not clear where the samples come from, singing sparsely in autotune only to be heavily delayed and not really singing at all, with some bassy ass drums. On some Koushik, El Guincho, Panda Bear type jumpoff conceptually. Conceptually, I mean, that's the concept right there. But how I'm gonna do that though?


Art of the Street Variety: C215 in India

Dude C215 made a trip to India to do some amazing pieces. Clearly I'm a big enthusiast of all of these. This is right up my alley. Some think it may be the first stencil/street artist to paint on the streets of India though I find that highly doubtful as I've peeped some amazing propaganda pieces and such with mine own eyes, y'herdme? If it makes it cooler to pose this as Westerners bringing their art to the Third World than DO YOU squeezers.

As he put his pieces up crowds would amass and watch, applauding when he was finished. Though the heat must have been overbearing it must be nice to throw pieces up in broad daylight without concern for getting bagged. These pieces were done between the 7th and 16th of this month in the Karol Bagh District of New Delhi. Karol Bagh is a pretty crowded "bazaar" district in New Delhi. Of course this is courtesy of Wooster Collective. Photos are by Romanywg.


Monday, October 20, 2008

Art: S.H. Raza

I realize I've been slacking on the Indian Art posting these days so I wanted to get back to that. S.H. Raza (1922-Present) is an Indian artist akin to leaders of the movement like MF Husain and FN Souza. He's even got the two initials + last name thing going on. Like the others, he is also a graduate of the Sir J.J. School of Art. (Of course Souza never graduated as he was kicked out for joining the anti-British movement). Raza also spent time at the Ecole Nationale des Beaux-Arts which had a significant impact on his work. It was in France he came across the Abstract Expressionism movement that influenced him in the 50s and 60s before his return to core Indian aesthetics in the 70s.

Prakriti Purush:

Sapta Rasa:


Bindu Rajasthan:

Lieu Solitaire:

Untitled PS79:


Music: Busta Rhymes and Arab Money

So I was at "the club" this weekend. It was a cousin's girlfriend's birthday so I spent some time with the Indian crowd, drinking heavily with a scene that was fond of wearing blazers with jeans and giving pounds to anyone for any reason. While I'm not so big on the blazers, I love the pounds. Anywho, my cousin Sumit and his boys spent most of the night talking about Arab Money and doing some silly dance. I had 8-13 drinks and said dance became extremely enjoyable to me as well. Low and behold I check out my homegirl Alyson's blog today and came across this gem:


News: Obama in St. Louis

BaRaCK oBaMa SpeaKInG to LiKE 100,000,000 PEoPLe in ST. LouIS. ThIZ is KewL.


Sunday, October 19, 2008

Music: Takeaway Shows: Sebastian Tellier + Animal Collective

Came across this Takeaway performance of Divine by Sebastien Tellier:

And this one of Taste by Animal Collective:

And this one. Swate:


Saturday, October 18, 2008

Herbs: Asher Roth

Asher Roth's a herb. I don't have time right now but I'll get back to this eventually. Basically though, kid's a joke. I'm finna write a diss track probably.

Update: 10/23/08: Asher Roth is still a herb. He always will be one. Who raps about Beer Pong?


Friday, October 17, 2008

News: Rockstar Hedge Fund Manager Quits, Shits on Industry in Letter, and Tosses in a "Legalize Marijuana" For the Hell of It

Andrew Lahde, manager of a small California hedge fund, Lahde Capital, burst into the spotlight last year after his one-year-old fund returned 866 percent betting against the subprime collapse. He made hell of guap.

Last month, he did the unthinkable -- he shut things down, claiming dealing with his bank counterparties had become too risky. Today, Lahde passed along his "goodbye" letter, a rollicking missive on everything from greed to weed. Enjoy:

Today I write not to gloat. Given the pain that nearly everyone is experiencing, that would be entirely inappropriate. Nor am I writing to make further predictions, as most of my forecasts in previous letters have unfolded or are in the process of unfolding. Instead, I am writing to say goodbye.

Recently, on the front page of Section C of the Wall Street Journal, a hedge fund manager who was also closing up shop (a $300 million fund), was quoted as saying, "What I have learned about the hedge fund business is that I hate it." I could not agree more with that statement. I was in this game for the money. The low hanging fruit, i.e. idiots whose parents paid for prep school, Yale, and then the Harvard MBA, was there for the taking. These people who were (often) truly not worthy of the education they received (or supposedly received) rose to the top of companies such as AIG, Bear Stearns and Lehman Brothers and all levels of our government. All of this behavior supporting the Aristocracy, only ended up making it easier for me to find people stupid enough to take the other side of my trades. God bless America.

There are far too many people for me to sincerely thank for my success. However, I do not want to sound like a Hollywood actor accepting an award. The money was reward enough. Furthermore, the endless list those deserving thanks know who they are.
I will no longer manage money for other people or institutions. I have enough of my own wealth to manage. Some people, who think they have arrived at a reasonable estimate of my net worth, might be surprised that I would call it quits with such a small war chest. That is fine; I am content with my rewards. Moreover, I will let others try to amass nine, ten or eleven figure net worths. Meanwhile, their lives suck. Appointments back to back, booked solid for the next three months, they look forward to their two week vacation in January during which they will likely be glued to their Blackberries or other such devices. What is the point? They will all be forgotten in fifty years anyway. Steve Balmer, Steven Cohen, and Larry Ellison will all be forgotten. I do not understand the legacy thing. Nearly everyone will be forgotten. Give up on leaving your mark. Throw the Blackberry away and enjoy life.

So this is it. With all due respect, I am dropping out. Please do not expect any type of reply to emails or voicemails within normal time frames or at all. Andy Springer and his company will be handling the dissolution of the fund. And don't worry about my employees, they were always employed by Mr. Springer's company and only one (who has been well-rewarded) will lose his job.

I have no interest in any deals in which anyone would like me to participate. I truly do not have a strong opinion about any market right now, other than to say that things will continue to get worse for some time, probably years. I am content sitting on the sidelines and waiting. After all, sitting and waiting is how we made money from the subprime debacle. I now have time to repair my health, which was destroyed by the stress I layered onto myself over the past two years, as well as my entire life -- where I had to compete for spaces in universities and graduate schools, jobs and assets under management -- with those who had all the advantages (rich parents) that I did not. May meritocracy be part of a new form of government, which needs to be established.

On the issue of the U.S. Government, I would like to make a modest proposal. First, I point out the obvious flaws, whereby legislation was repeatedly brought forth to Congress over the past eight years, which would have reigned in the predatory lending practices of now mostly defunct institutions. These institutions regularly filled the coffers of both parties in return for voting down all of this legislation designed to protect the common citizen. This is an outrage, yet no one seems to know or care about it. Since Thomas Jefferson and Adam Smith passed, I would argue that there has been a dearth of worthy philosophers in this country, at least ones focused on improving government.

Capitalism worked for two hundred years, but times change, and systems become corrupt. George Soros, a man of staggering wealth, has stated that he would like to be remembered as a philosopher. My suggestion is that this great man start and sponsor a forum for great minds to come together to create a new system of government that truly represents the common man's interest, while at the same time creating rewards great enough to attract the best and brightest minds to serve in government roles without having to rely on corruption to further their interests or lifestyles. This forum could be similar to the one used to create the operating system, Linux, which competes with Microsoft's near monopoly. I believe there is an answer, but for now the system is clearly broken.

Lastly, while I still have an audience, I would like to bring attention to an alternative food and energy source. You won't see it included in BP's, "Feel good. We are working on sustainable solutions," television commercials, nor is it mentioned in ADM's similar commercials. But hemp has been used for at least 5,000 years for cloth and food, as well as just about everything that is produced from petroleum products. Hemp is not marijuana and vice versa. Hemp is the male plant and it grows like a weed, hence the slang term. The original American flag was made of hemp fiber and our Constitution was printed on paper made of hemp. It was used as recently as World War II by the U.S. Government, and then promptly made illegal after the war was won. At a time when rhetoric is flying about becoming more self-sufficient in terms of energy, why is it illegal to grow this plant in this country?

Ah, the female. The evil female plant -- marijuana. It gets you high, it makes you laugh, it does not produce a hangover. Unlike alcohol, it does not result in bar fights or wife beating. So, why is this innocuous plant illegal? Is it a gateway drug? No, that would be alcohol, which is so heavily advertised in this country. My only conclusion as to why it is illegal, is that Corporate America, which owns Congress, would rather sell you Paxil, Zoloft, Xanax and other additive drugs, than allow you to grow a plant in your home without some of the profits going into their coffers. This policy is ludicrous. It has surely contributed to our dependency on foreign energy sources. Our policies have other countries literally laughing at our stupidity, most notably Canada, as well as several European nations (both Eastern and Western). You would not know this by paying attention to U.S. media sources though, as they tend not to elaborate on who is laughing at the United States this week. Please people, let's stop the rhetoric and start thinking about how we can truly become self-sufficient.

With that I say good-bye and good luck.

All the best,

Andrew Lahde


Thursday, October 16, 2008

Music: Best Albums of 2008

I know the year's not over. I know we still have a few months left. If any additions need to be made, I'll make them later. I might have missed a few but, in large part, these are the albums I've listened to the most in 2008. In no particular order (pretty much in order), I give you my favorite albums of 2008:

MGMT - Oracular Spectacular (I think I heard/had demos for this album in Jan 2007 but nonetheless it got a physical release date in 2008. Seems like mad long ago.)

TV on the Radio - Dear Science

M83 - Saturday=Youth

Fleet Foxes - Fleet Foxes

Koushik - Out My Window

Animal Collective - Water Curses EP

Gang Gang Dance - Saint Dymphna

Lil Wayne - Carter 3

Francis & The Lights - A Modern Promise

The Dodos - Visiter

Passion Pit - Chunk of Change

Beach House - Devotion

Erykah Badu - New Amerykah Part One (4th World War)

Lykke Li - Youth Novels

Chairlift - Does You Inspire You

Cut Copy - In Ghost Colours

Amazing Baby - Infinite Fucking Cross EP

Motherfuckers without albums I bopped to hella heavy: Leif, Boy Crisis, Harrison Schaaf, and that song Boat Trip some dude made.


News: Salman Rushdie Rides the 6 Train

(From Gawker)


Music: Empire of the Sun

Empire of the Sun, "Walking On A Dream" from Benjamin Technology on Vimeo.



Wednesday, October 15, 2008



Hedge Fund Performance as of Late

The last quarter has been, as Dinakar Singh put it in his investor letter, “abysmal”, as returns have significantly decreased prompting an increase in redemptions. We have four investment letters from alternative investment funds and will go fund by fund to include aspects of the letter we found to be the most telling. It’s interesting to note that whereas Cerberus reads like a market overview and Tontine fails to accept much responsibility for losses, TPG-Axon’s letter refers to the firm as “overconfident” and claims hedge funds are one of the factors contributing to market turmoil. While much of the blame for this turmoil is attributed to credit, an overarching theme seems to be the impact of commodity prices as a major factor, globalization and emerging markets, the government as a financial player, hedge funds and increased velocity, and the self-perpetuating nature of redemptions.

· We’ll start with David Einhorn’s Greenlight Capital, dated October 1, 2008. Greenlight Capital is an activist hedge fund started in 1996. The firm primarily invests in the publicly traded North American corporate debt and equity markets. They also manage a fund of funds and pa private equity fund through affiliates. Of note was their Motorola spinnoff of Freescale Semi, the biggest LBO ever for the tech sector. As of the end of 2007 Greenlight was able to boast annualized returns of 27% going back 10 years. Einhorn’s most recently been in the news in relation to his calling a short on Lehman much prior to their downfall.
Greenlight : Sept 08, -12.40%; YTD, -15.20%
o “Since our specialty is not macro forecasting, let alone guessing how some erratic actors in Washington will behave, we are not in a position to know when these headwinds will reverse. However, we believe they will.”
o In hindsight, our suggestion from last quarter’s letter to go to cash and go to the beach would have been the better option”
o Einhorn attributes much of the situation to investors unwinding trades due to: a) nervousness about short-term losses, b) reducing risk, 3) redemptions
o Einhorn describes current volatility in the markets as “almost schizophrenic in nature”.
o Short-selling restrictions from the government helped fuel losses this quarter
- “On several of the ‘government bail-out days’ or more aptly ‘change the rules of short-selling days’ the shorts recovered dramatically more than the longs, especially the financial shorts abundant in our portfolio… Our plan is to balance waiting out this period in our highest conviction short ideas, while also maintaining reasonable portfolio exposures”.
- “The short positions in the portfolio generated about 1% of the loss during the quarter. While we did have another contribution from the Lehman short, most of those gains were earned in prior quarters”.
o While they have recently been closed to new capital they are opening the funds for a limited amount of additional capital on November 1, 2008.
o “There’s no crying in baseball” – Jimmy Dugan played by Tom Hanks in “A League of Their Own”.

· Cerberus Capital
o Dated September 25, 2008 the letter opens with notes on returns from the quarter ending June 30
o “One of the best buying opportunities in distressed assets in our career”
o The letter reads more like a market overview of recent events coupled with opportunities Cerberus sees as profitable
o “None of our problem positions are large enough to create a real return problem for the fund.” !!! - Signed Stephen Feinberg, Managing Member, and William L. Richter, Senior Managing Director

· Tontine Associates, LLC is Jeffrey L. Gendell’s fund. Gendell started the fund in Greenwich in 1997 after leaving Odyssey Partners. As of 2007 they managed about $7BN in assets.
Tontine Partners : Sept 08, -59.30%; YTD, -66.70%
Tontine Capital Partners : Sept 08, -38.50%; YTD, -31.50%
o “The combination of falling commodity prices, massive anticipated hedge fund redemptions and the seizing up of the credit markets caused an enormous dislocation in our portfolios.
- “We clearly underestimated several things, most importantly the tsunami of redemptions that are being delivered to hedge funds as investors line up to get out of these funds as well as record outflows from equity mutual funds.”
o Tontine Partners portfolio heavily invested in steel:
- “Unfortunately, the public is not interested in future earnings or large cash positions and we saw U.S. Steel fall from $180 per share to $70 per share despite the expectation that they will earn over $18 per share this year.”
o Tontine Capital Partners portfolio:
- We hesitate to give you any names here as to encourage short sellers but the smaller cap stocks were just blasted in September, especially those that are associated with anything related to energy. We did not own any oil stocks.”
o Tontine-25 Fund:
· “We called August right but September… was a mistake.”
o “We still believe the best use of funds for our companies is to continue to buy back stock on a systematic basis.”

· Dinakar Singh’s TPG-Axon sent investors a 17-page letter.
o “This is the first major global economic inflection point we have witnessed in the ‘new’ era of interconnected global markets, and with high velocity investors (hedge funds) as significant players… so far it has not been pretty”.
o “In sharp and dramatic contrast [to the first half of 2008], the last quarter has been abysmal, and we are sorry to have let you down with the terrible performance of the portfolio.” (Writer’s bold and underline).
o “Fundamental ‘disruptions’ were created by wild swings in commodities and growth sentiment. This was followed by remarkable degrees of hedge fund disruption, as funds rushed to unwind positions and ‘de-risk’… In hindsight we grew a bit overconfident in our ability to navigate treacherous waters.”
o “The skyrocketing prices of most commodities caused investors to flee toward commodity rich countries and industries, and away from commodity users. As a result, an accelerating focus on the ‘rest of the world’ vs. the domestic US economy morphed ultimately into an even narrower focus on commodities.”
- “The mid-year data served as the spark for a wild rush from one side of the ship to the other… everything that had gone up in the past few years was dumped by investors as they fled in the other direction”
- Credit fears triggered panic in US financials, spurring broader market panic in September
o The integration of 3 major structural factors:
- An end of an era of an ‘amplified US economy
- Increased globalization and inter-dependence of markets
- Dramatic increase in market ‘velocity’ – hedge funds.


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