Monday, January 5, 2009

Craigslisting: $325 East Village

I Craigslist. Everyone does it. All the cool kids at least. Sometimes I respond to Missed Connections that have nothing to do with me for the heck of it. Sometimes I post rants on that one race of humans I passionately hate - YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. Sometimes I just read rants and send links of the really funny, in a really terrible kind of way, racial rants to my friends who are really funny in a terrible-person kind of way - YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE. Sometimes I look at apartments months ahead of when I actually want to move out, send funny letters about who I am to people, and then don't show up when I say I will. I'll try to share more of my Craigslist exploits here. Like, sometimes I come across posts like this:

$325 EAST VILLAGE- Controlled and large 3 bed (East Village) (map)

Reply to: [?] Date: 2009-01-01, 4:39AM EST

-Wow…I can’t believe I am doing this..But I am looking for someone to rent my rent controlled apartment. The monthly rent is extremely cheap and would be a dream for many people in this city. It is in the east village close to A and 3rd. I caught my wife in bed with our neighbor who is almost 20 years younger than her. She is refusing to move out and still seeing him when I am at work, on my bed…I need someone to move in and help me get her out. Man or woman. My plan is to act like we are a couple until she can’t take it anymore. I have done everything possible to try and get her out..But she is a scumbag….So we need to create some type of plan that would get her out..i would charge you very cheap and all you would have to do is act like we are dating. We might have to kiss if front her and make fake sounds when we are in the bedroom. Please respond with a detailed description of your plan to get her out and a little about your self. You could live there after she is out and unless we fall in love we don’t have to do anything else.

a at 3 google map yahoo map

it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interestsPostingID: 976182933

1 comment:

lateefx said...

W T F.

I'd love to fact check this one!

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