A VISIT FROM AUNT BOOB: NON-IRONIC NON-EXCITING NICK CAGE DREAM

last night i dreamt that i was at a small bar with some friends and we were standing around chatting when nick cage walked in, and not at all in like a celebrity-walking-in way, he just sort of strolled in awkwardly and walked up to our circle and stood on the outside, and waited a minute before trying to laugh at one of our jokes and say something just to say something. he was like a kid in high school who used to hang out but who went away for a couple years and now that he's back he realizes he wasn't really friends with anyone to begin with. it was also weird that he wasn't drinking, he just had his hands in his pockets. he also had a bodyguard of some sort hovering even further behind, and kept nervously looking back at him, for some sort of comfort. at one point he turned to me and said "i heard you like pizza" and of course i confirmed and then he tried to think of something to follow that up with but all he could muster was "cool." then he and i were talking and i realized that his bodyguard was actually a cop, and when he would turn to look at him it was out of fear that the cop would disapprove, cuz at one point he leaned in and whispered to me "do you have any aerosol?" and i said "i have some compressed air, at home" and he looked both disappointed and ashamed, and immediately left, with the cop in tow.